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Hindi grammar

Aap, tum, tu: three ways to say you

English has one word for you. Hindi has three, and picking the wrong one is the fastest way to sound either cold or disrespectful. The good news is that one of them is a safe default, and you can get through an entire first meeting using only that.

Practice in Bolo →Opens the app. If you already have a session going, you pick up there.

The short answer

Use आप with anyone older than you, anyone you just met, and every one of his relatives until someone tells you otherwise. Nobody has ever been offended by too much respect.

आप कैसे हैं?
aap kaise hai~?
How are you? (respectful, to a man)
आप कैसी हैं?
aap kaisee hai~?
How are you? (respectful, to a woman)

All three, side by side

आप
aap
you, respectful. Elders, in-laws, strangers, anyone senior
तुम
tum
you, familiar. Friends, cousins, siblings, your partner
तू
too
you, intimate or insulting depending on the relationship. Leave it alone

तू is not a beginner tool. Between two lifelong friends it is warmth. Aimed at a stranger it is a provocation. The line between the two is not something you can judge from outside the family yet.

The verb moves with the pronoun

This is the part people miss. The pronoun and the verb ending travel together, so learn them as one block rather than swapping the pronoun into a sentence you already know.

आप कहाँ हैं?
aap kahaa~ hai~?
Where are you? (aap takes the plural verb)
तुम कहाँ हो?
tum kahaa~ ho?
Where are you? (tum has its own form, ho)
तू कहाँ है?
too kahaa~ hai?
Where are you? (tu takes the singular)

The other pronouns

मैं
mai~
I
हम
ham
we
यह
yah
this, he or she when they are nearby
वह
vah
that, he or she when they are elsewhere
वे
ve
they, and also a single person spoken about respectfully

Hindi does not split he and she in the pronoun. यह and वह cover both. The gender shows up in the verb and the adjectives instead, which is why agreement matters so much in this language.

Saying it about yourself

मैं ठीक हूँ, धन्यवाद
mai~ theek hoo~, dhanyavaad
I am fine, thank you
हम अच्छे हैं
ham achchhe hai~
We are well

One rule to carry

When in doubt, आप. Then let the family move you to तुम when they are ready. That invitation usually arrives as a joke about being too formal, and accepting it is its own small milestone.

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